rss feedfacebook pagefortress twitter

Blogs Member Blogs Trying to save some nerds at Ars Technica
 

Trying to save some nerds at Ars Technica Hot

jeb Written by jeb     August 24, 2008     1748     

I pay attention to the forums at Ars Technica. Ars is probably the most profound collection of computer nerddom on the Internet that's not totally overrun by chaff (I'm looking at you Digg) and trolls (I'm looking at you Slashdot). There's a forum there for nothing but cooling off your PC. Like we talk about Modern AT, they talk about fans and coolant. It's intense.

The GESC (Gaming Extra Strength Caplets) forum is where I spend most of my time. mostly lurking, reading the insane debates between PS3 and XBOX360 partisans, looking for news on Wii, DS, and old Mac games like Diablo. Recently, two threads have appeared there from folks looking for boardgames--extending their recent video game experiences into the tabletop realm. 

 I HAVE TO SAVE THEM. 

In the first thread, the OP posted this:

so after becoming fast addicted to advance wars: dual strike on the ds, and seeing BobDole's sweet setup im jonesing for a good live board game session. im probably limited to one with minimal (2-3 hours) set-up/learning curve, and one that doesnt need more than 4 people since im thinking thats my max of friends that i can trust to commit to it.

 Advance Wars is basically a tactical wargame. Capture factories, build units, blow up bases.  What is recommended to this guy in the first 15 posts? ROBORALLY, CARCASSONNE, GHEOS, SETTLERS OF CATAN (WITH SEAFARERS!!!!), MYSTERY IN THE ABBEY, PUERTO RICO,and POWER GRID. Thankfully some folks mentioned TITAN, LORD OF THE RINGS, STAR WARS: MINIATURES, JUNTA, and TWILIGHT STRUGGLE.  But they were getting washed out in the stream of oh-you'll-love STONE AGE and anything on BrettSpielWelt responses. I had to wade in there with this salvo:

Jesus, Puerto Rico? This guy likes Advance Wars DS and you're recommending Puerto Rico?

Ignore half of the comments in this thread.

 

Here's what you need: TITAN. Mentioned above. It's getting re-released and it's fucking amazing.

Here's what you'd love but will never find: SPACE HULK and/or MUTANT CHRONICLES: SIEGE OF THE CITADEL. They're out of print, but they rock so hard your brain will kick your head's ass. Other recommends for the game boutique crowd:
VIKTORY II
NEXUS OPS
STARCRAFT: THE BOARDGAME

Things you can get right now, at Target, or TRU or whatever: Star Wars Risk: Clone Wars Edition is a clearance item at TRU. It's goddamned dynamite, especially compared to crappy regular Risk. This is 4-players. If you'll have 3 or 5 players, then get the SW:Original Trilogy Edition instead. Even Risk itself was recently updated, and largely "fixed" with Objectives, keeping it from taking forever.

Check out Fortress: Ameritrash when you've become addicted to the hobby like the rest of us.

That was thread one. A few days later, another user asks for recommendations for a neophyte gamer:

I pass by this store "X9 Games" every time I go to the movies. FYI, This is a type of place where greasy teenagers go to play D&D/MTG, but I always get sucked in looking at all the cool fantasy/tactical board games there. Usually my girlfriend tries to hurry me out of there, but I keep thinking I'd like to get one of those games and play with a small group of friends (<6).

A bit about me: I'm 25 and a computer programmer, but I've never played D&D or any RPG/tactical style board games. But they look like so much fun I just want to try one.

I was wondering if I could get some recommendations about good games that are fun for novice-to-intermediate players?

Again, note the request in there for RPG Tactical gaming.  He mentioned his girlfriend a few posts later, and you know what comes next. LOST CITIES, TICKET TO RIDE, CARCASSONNE, BOHNANZA, and SETTLERS OF CATAN. Only SETTLERS is even close to what he wants, and it's not very close. What the hell, people? I replied:

Is anyone even reading the OP's in these goddamned board game threads? The other guy liked Advance Wars DS--and folks recommended PUERTO RICO. This guy specifically says he wants an RPG tactical game and you come up with LOST CITIES. Christ.

You'd be better off with Knizia's LORD OF THE RINGS, the co-op adventuring game to start if she digs that theme. Then graduate to RUNEBOUND or RETURN OF THE HEROES. FURY OF DRACULA might be good if you have more than 2 players. If SF is more her bag, I would wait for BATTLESTAR GALACTICA coming out soon.

If she's smoking hot she'll like either DESCENT: JOURNEYS IN THE DARK and/or ARKHAM HORROR.

I have to save these people from the BGG crowd all over the Internet. They are getting their peanut butter in my chocolate.

 

Powered by JReviews
Comments (27)
  • 2008-08-25 13:22:36 | avatarmikelawson

    You rock, dude. I completely agree with you, because these guys are making the cardinal sin of retail: not matching the customer with what they will like.

    If someone is looking for a minivan, you don't sell them a Corvette. It might mean that you get those numbers for the week, but that 'vette might be coming back the next day too.

    I liked Baldur's Gate; any surprise that I think that Runebound and Talisman rock?

    --Mike L.

  • 2008-08-25 14:08:43 | avatarAarontu

    "The sheeple wants to try a board game! (doesn't listen to request for sci-fi tactical combat) Let's suggest LOST CITIES and TICKET TO RIDE! Sheeples need gateway games; they can't handle anything else!!!!!"

  • 2008-08-25 14:49:20 | avatarvialiy

    I would understand the recommendations if the OP had said he enjoys MS Office.

  • 2008-08-25 15:09:41 | avatarSchweig!

    You've done well, Jeb. You saved a few souls.

    Every board game recommendation thread should carry a warning: "If you want to recommend LOST CITIES, TICKET TO RIDE or CARCASSONNE, please read the OP again and reconsider your answer.

  • 2008-08-25 15:28:28 | avatarGary Sax

    Hey, I was one of the people who recommended Twilight Struggle in the original thread...

  • 2008-08-25 15:38:40 | avatarjeb

    I should have singled you out, Gary--you and the Titan guy were the only ones making any frigging sense in that thread. PUERTO RICO! I still can't believe it. The guy said he liked blowing stuff up in AW:DS, said he liked the awesome Wormhole setup in this thread, and they wanted him to play PUERTO RICO! I still can't get over it.

    That Wormhole setup, folks, by the way, worth checking out. Check out this image from it. The link is above for more shots.
    http://brandonkahler.com/arspics/08-2008_Gameboard/IMG_1143.jpg

  • 2008-08-25 15:38:57 | avatarGary Sax

    Incidentally, you guys may not trawl it, but as someone who does I can tell you that arstechnica is the perfect type of place where AT would have a huge impact. These are geeks and AT themes would really fly with these people. Which is why it's painful to a guy like jeb to see people recommending boring Euros there. It'd be like recommending some bloody violent and complex AT game to someone telling you they want to buy something for their two four year olds.

  • 2008-08-25 15:42:30 | avatarBigLizard

    The sheeples probably can't recommend AT-type games because they've never played AT-style games and haven't a clue what they're really about. Just a theory.

  • 2008-08-25 16:22:29 | avatarBigLizard

    That projection setup looks great! Just think some day all game boards may be setup by some sort of computer projection. Perhaps some kind of thin mat or board that sits on the table and shows images of whatever game board is input. The possibilities are intriguing. It'd be a blessing for those games with tile setup (Settlers or C&C games, e.g.). But could a computer projection really replace the feel and satisfaction of solid cardboard and paper?

    BillN

  • 2008-08-25 16:42:36 | avatarGary Sax

    The beer is on the table. A true ATer/minatures gamer.

  • 2008-08-25 16:45:46 | avatarmikelawson

    Coronas? Come on man, not a beach in sight.

    --Mike L.

  • 2008-08-25 16:52:51 | avatarGary Sax

    Maybe he could project a beach onto that table. He probably could, the setup is amazing.

  • 2008-08-25 20:08:11 | avatarMichael Barnes

    Oh those wacky Euro Evangelists...at it again I see.

    "If you like extremely competitive video games with conflict-oriented themes perhaps you would rather quite enjoy a sophisticated game like LOST CITIES, a game I rather quite like due to its clever mechanics"

    Nice work Jeb, counter-reformation is one of our key weapons.

  • 2008-08-26 05:50:14 | avatarGary Sax

    Oh. My. God. From the thread:

    "Truth is, we know what he wants more than he does.

    I'll second (third?) the recommendation for Lost Cities. It's like 12 bucks. It's also a great "gateway" game."


    Much better than dropping $50 (or more, much more) on some of the above linked games and then finding out that a) you hate them or b) nobody will play with you.

  • 2008-08-26 06:44:41 | avatarGary Sax

    I just turned my forum warrior switch on in that thread too. I need to stop now.

  • 2008-08-26 06:59:36 | avatarjeb

    HEAD ASPLODE.

    Greg's not lying--someone actually wrote that: "we know hat he wants more than he does." I had to whale on them again.

  • 2008-08-26 07:20:40 | avatarAarontu

    Wow. I just saw the thread. Those crazy "Lost Cities is the end-all be-all girl game" folks are at it again!

    For the curious:
    http://episteme.arstechnica.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/39309975/m/822000214931

  • 2008-08-26 07:35:48 | avatarjeb

    [url=http://episteme.arstechnica.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/39309975/m/822000214931] Here's the link Aarontu wants to point to[/url]. Put on some goggles, the mouth breathing is thick in here.

  • 2008-08-26 08:07:55 | avatarubarose

    Jesus H. Christ Almightly on a stick!

  • 2008-08-26 08:22:33 | avatarMichael Barnes

    Yeah, reading that stuff I kind of felt how I imagined that Sgt. Hartman felt when he found that jelly donut in Private Pyle's footlocker.

  • 2008-08-26 09:17:44 | avatarCitadel

    Wow, I want to set up a projector to give me space terrain. Or maybe I could lay my tv down flat. Hmmm, I am not rich: probably not a good idea.

  • 2008-08-26 10:47:25 | avatarjeb


    I set up another blogpost for the WORMHOLE threadjack. Jesus, that thing is awesome.

    Meanwhile, one of the folks there tried to justify his TTR and LOST CITIES picks with the BGG chestnut: "the games you suggest are too hard to recommend." This is so goddamned obnoxious I can't stand it. The OP is a 25-year-old computer programmer--how could he possibly understand a game like DESCENT? The douchbaggery is endless.

    Thankfully, some other folks have chimed in with TANNHAUSER and HEROSCAPE--I think the OP will be ok. Me, I need meds, but I may have saved at least one soul from a lifetime of role selection.

  • 2008-08-26 10:58:39 | avatarmikoyan

    Why do people think it takes a degree in rocket science to understand one of the harder games? Puerto Rico, Caylus and all of them aren't that hard to grasp. Some of the older AT games are pretty easy. Hell, Wargames are pretty easy to understand (especially the newer ones with more streamlined rules).

  • 2008-08-26 12:12:42 | avatarMichael Barnes

    Don't you know? These Games of Ours are so sophisticated and elegant that firstly, you have to be introduced to them by an Ascended Master who will convey to you the proper first-degree games. Second, everyone in the world when they mean "games" actually means LOST CITIES, whether they know it or not. And third, first-degree initiates are not allowed in the clubhouse to play PUERTO RICO or CAYLUS. They're too dumb and just one level over "sheeples".

  • 2008-08-26 12:47:13 | avatarAarontu

    And third, first-degree initiates are not allowed in the clubhouse to play PUERTO RICO or CAYLUS. They're too dumb and just one level over "sheeples".

    That, and they won't know the optimal moves and end up making someone else win! THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE

  • 2008-08-27 01:52:08 | avatarSchweig!

    Everybody know playing PUERTO RICO with n00bs is a pain in the arse, so disgruntling them with repeated plays of LOST CITIES is actually quite a good idea.

    Jokes aside, the OP seriously needs Battlelore.

  • 2008-08-27 05:40:37 | avatarmikoyan

    If you want a game where everyone plays the same way, why not just play with yourself? I think some of the standouts in BGG would hate my gaming group. We mix it up all the time.

Only registered users can write comments!
Text Size

Top