So on Friday night I hooked up with a couple of buddies of mine. We picked up some beer and headed on down to the beach. Guy’s night out. We sat there and discussed past Super Hero movies debating exactly how much it matters if Batman talks in a voice like Gomer Pyle and how it's odd that some people find it completely irrelevant whether or not his voice was comical to you. We discussed why X2, a movie with very little fireworks after the opening scene and with a pointless fight using X23, still managed to be the best of the bunch somehow (we left Incredible off the table believing it was unfair to the other movies). We discussed how Superman failed so miserably and what we liked and didn’t like about the series of movies leading up this new Avengers flick.

We enjoyed the beers, watched the boats sit in the harbor, looked at the mountains and threw a ball for some guys dog since his owner didn't seem to care and we were suckers. We even lit up a spliff to get us into the appropriate 16 year old boy frame of mind needed to really enjoy this latest super hero blockbuster in all it's 3D glory.

I love Prince, but he is not a "modern day Mozart" as he claimed in the Cream video. He's Prince, he writes short 2-6 minute pop songs. Hardly comparable. Not worse, but not the same.

My first posts in the F:AT community were in the TI:3 vs. Nexus Ops thread. I can't remember what game won but I do remember I was pro TI:3 and Weeks attacked me immediately. I didn't know who he was but I found him offensive. Within a couple of weeks I liked the guy and found myself defending him on several occasions.
But the argument never went away. The argument was about streamlining, it was about long geeky games vs. short cool games, it was about game design and what the goals should be.

The argument never goes away, in fact it returned with a vengeance this year when Eclipse came out. Barnes, amongst others, proclaimed it a TI:3 killer. Well, that made me immediately defensive; "What the fuck does he know anyway, there is no way a three hour game can replace TI:3. It is simply not possible to do what TI:3 does in that time frame.

Now, I've noticed something. When I was younger, childless and occasionally single I would have no problems with time frame. The longer the better, no doubt in my mind. But as time became more of a concern I had to worry about it. A game that did roughly the same stuff in a managable time frame was definitely a bonus. Not better, because I remembered those care free days and the games we played and nothing can compare to that. Nothing. But I was suddenly willing to make exceptions; "Well, she's not as hot and her effort in the sack is really lacking, but man I need it and she’s is more the willing, I just wish it lasted longer." That's how I was looking at shorter games.

Sure, technically maybe Eclipse really does do everything TI:3 does in half the time except politics (easy part of the game to let go of). Sounds cool right? But, you see, it can't. The games we play are not just the game, it's the time and the time spent with people.

I've read a few times that people who are being held captive together, once they're free, very rarely want to see each other again. The time spent together is more than enough and they get sick of one another.

To me, that means that short term diplomacy is much easier. You might agree to buddy up with me for an hour or two... come hour 5 you’re not so sure anymore, the potential for an epic backstab gets higher all the time. Backstabbing a buddy at hour 5 in a 6.5 hour game is fucking brutal. You've built up all this trust and then you just chuck it out the window. You've built up a connect to the game in a way that is different than what is possible in a shorter game.

I used to compare it to a cup of tea, you need time for the game experience to steep, but who lets their tea steep for 6 hours! It's usually just a couple of minutes. What is the correct amount of time for a theme to steep, can 3 hours do it?

Sure it can. But if Risk was only three hours long then I wouldn't have all those crazy epic memories of it as a child. The time is a big part of it. Most of the designs these days seem to want to speed you up, it pisses me off sometimes.

When I buy groceries I always have my knapsack, and it always takes me some time to fill it up. I feel like the cashier gets antsy and a little pissed with me. I can sense the; "get the fuck out of here can't you see there's another customer behind you" gaze penetrating my soul. It drives me crazy and reminds me how much time has changed since I was a little kid in Manitouwadge Ontario. Everything is faster. But is it better?

I feel like that when I play Nexus Ops too, even Puerto Rico. Both of those games (just to show it's not an AT or Euro bias) gave me the same feeling after the first play through: "That's it?". It was over so quick. I feel like the design of these types of games is like that cashier in the supermarket. Hurry up and finish dude, there's another rule set we all really want to see and if you take too long we won't get to play 8 games tonight. The design rushes me through the process never giving me time to contemplate, chat, or just enjoy the moment. Everything is a fucking rush to the finish line. To quote Deep Purple in one of their lamest periods, "It's not the kill, it's the thrill of the chase". I need time. Although I enjoy the kill too.

I don’t always want to play 8 fucking games in one night. I enjoy the slow pace and the calm of not setting up and taking down game after the game. I enjoy the slow burn of everyone sitting around taking it easy, I enjoy not explaining 8 sets of rules one after the other. One game for one group with the time. The conversation is more natural, it's not all game focused, the game blends into the world around me and the theme and setting steep into my being.
For a reviewer I can see how short games would be a bonus. How many games like TI:3 can you realistically review in one year? It's a pain in the ass. But you could assess and review dozens of fillers with much less effort, your review numbers still go up. But for the average hobbyist what's the big deal? Why not spend time with just a couple games. My group is back into Chaos in the Old World, not a long game I know but the point is when we hook up the idea now is to just play the one game again and again. They love TI:3 and Nexus Ops never had anywhere near the same impact. It just can't do it. They're not comparable at all.

Look, Bach's Mass in B Minor is 2 CD's long and I wouldn't have it any other way. No fucking 3 minute punk tune, regardless of how clever the lyrics are, can ever replace that.

That said, I have Eclipse on pre-order and I'm pumped to try it out. I'm just not comparing it to TI:3 and I'm trying to get the comparison out of my mind. I know I will not tell my game group about the comparison. It will be hard not to notice though.

So, I got a baby. The doctors took it from my wifes belly, which is were I left it,I guess it's my fault.

It was  a C-section. I remember sitting beside her and the doctor held this weird looking baby covered in what appeared to be lard up over a curtain and said; "here's your baby." as he walked away I yelled; "We don't know the sex yet." he told me to come over and look.

When I got there I saw a penis, obviously a boy. Then I turned around to tell my wife and forgot all about the curtain. I saw everything. It's one thing to see your wife exposed but let me tell you, mid C-section is as exposed and she can ever be in front of me. I had to pretend I didn't see anything at all and go sit calmly beside her and tell her about our beautifull boy. This boy that has changed everything.

I remember going out every week-end to play games. It's foggy but I do remember it. I remember a game group I had, I remember going to my brothers house for our "Wildcat" sessions. These are sessions where we get drunk, and then record a song. We pick a genre and a topic and write and record a complete song that very night. Usually garbage and almost always funny. We've written hip hop, death metal, classic rock, Native traditional, Chinese folk, Quebecois Protest songs... the list goes on. I think that Wildcats and gaming are what I miss most right now.

Before the baby came I heard a shit ton of advice, and thousands of people told me things like; "You just don't know what your in for", "Your life is going to change forever", "there is no experience like it", "It's the best thing you'll ever do"

I think I heard enough boring platitudes about fatherhood that by the time the baby came out I knew exactly what to expect and so far... nothing has been a surprise. Enough people warned me that I didn't know what I was in for, that my life would change forever that by the time it happened I knew exactly what to expect and I did it anyway. So it's my fault.

I knew I'd be like this a long time ago too. I remember in our pre-natal classes we went around the room and all the guys had to say "when they got it". They'd say that during the ultrasound it finally clicked, or when they felt the first kick, something like that. It came to my turn and I said that it still hadn't clicked. I was hoping it would happen at the birth.

But it didn't. There was no "click"... just, nothing. I think for me it's really slow. I'm learning to love him day by day. It's a process. At first I thought something was wrong with me. I asked my friends; "How come I haven't clicked? Am I a monster? I don't feel emotional yet what is wrong with me?" I had intellectualized it too much. I had essentially removed myself from the equation.
Was the birth of my son the best moment of my life? No. I can say that unequivocally and without remorse. It was a pretty standard medical procedure and it intoduced me to someone, who although I love, doesn't really have too much to offer me just yet.  It's not that it wasn't a great moment, or that it didn't have meaning, it's that I've had so many great moments over the years that to elevate this above them all seems a little ignorant on my part. Who can create a hierarchy of moments that callously anyway? Am I going to let this procedure eclipse the great bonding moments I've had with my friends and family thus far? I am very excited for him to start learning how to speak, I am excited to find out just who he's going to be. But right now:? He's a selfish and inconsiderate person with pretty much nothing interesting to say. If I compare him to my brother, he's an absolute bore.
I felt worse after the birth. The grandparents were there and they cried when they saw him, my Brother in law showed up and he cried... what kind of asshole am I? I still haven't cried. I hold him close and kiss his head and feel very loving towards him but no uncontrollable emotional outbursts. Everything is slooooowwwww. Am I dead inside?

The most impressive thing he's done, at 5 weeks now, is roll over to his back from his front. Whooooooo. See, we give him "belly time", where he gets to try and exercise his practically useless limbs and occasionally he manages to flip himself over. That's it. Sure, he's cute, he's precious, and I adore him. But my standards are a bit higher then that. It's just not enough, and I don't feel bad about saying it. Although I sometimes feel like I'm supposed to feel bad based on the responses I've seen to my opinion.

When he was born I knew I would have to give up some of my hobbies, I just have too many, so I told my wife that the only one I'd keep was the band. I can't have everything. It's all I have left. I'll probably buy Quarriors cause I can play it at lunch here at work but other then that, forget it. It's too bad becuase my favorite games are generally really long games where we sit around all night playing one moster game, trash talk, drink, and hopefully get angry enough at each other that an apology is due come night's end. For now, that's done. At least the band makes money, gaming just costs money and it's not quite as rewarding.

But even the band is suffering. I haven't been able to write shit since he's been born. I play songs for him all the time but it's not real practice. He doesn't like to hear me practice, he wants something with a beat, something worked out. Our little music critic can apparently tell the difference! What a dick! So I must have played a thousand lullabyes lately ( I have a book of lullabyes from around the world, great book too) and I am so sick of those strong simple melodies. Man, they're all in 3/4 it seems so I'm getting sick of anything in 3/4. I must have played Rubber Ducky a couple hundred times too, dancing around like a fool. I love the bridge though...

Every day when I / make my way to the tubby
I find a fella who's / cute and yellow and chubby

Rub a dub dubby

Rhyming fella and yellow is genius, don't get me wrong and the jazzy chords are fun to riff on, but I was starting to feel limited. So, after Barnes last blog thingy I started playing him Slayer. He loves the riff in the middle of Angel of Death, the one Public Enemy used. I also started playing him some Willie Dixon... Spoonfull has been great as a sleep tonic. I just bounce the little guy around while singing spoonfull and he passes right out. Turns out he's not nearly as sensitive to genre as my wife would have me believe.

But no games, just none.

I miss them, they look at me when I'm sitting on the couch. I sit in the can with my TI3 expansion rules and cards and look wistfully at them, longing to have friends again. I have practiced my Carrom skills sitting alone in the living room, or with a baby on my lap, trying to bounce the striker off the far side and pocket the pieces left behind my shooting line (we play the no shooting backwards rule). My bank shots are getting pretty good! I've played around with Earth Reborn trying to come up with kick ass scenario's that I just can't play test.

Games I've played since Sunderland was born...

Wizard (Screw your neighbour) which hardly counts
Survive... but only Two Player
7  Wonders at work (thank god for work, without it I wouldn't play at all)

uh, I think that's it. I play a lot of video games now. Mortal Kombat and Metro 2033. Mortal Kombat is amazing. But video games just aren't the same.

New feature in my life... I rush to the store whenever my wife wants anything... [i]anything[/i]

"Hey honey we're low on diapers."

"No worries babe I'll walk down and get you some"

"Let me make a list first so you don't have to go again later on."

"No worries there babe, I'll go eight times in one day if  you like" (anything to get out of the house!)

That's my life right now. I used to game every week-end, I used to have friends, I used to be irresponsible occasionally, I would walk around downtown aimlessly, stop at the comic store, wander into EB games, go the Art Gallery, I used to just jump up and go to see some new Jazz guitarist, movie or local metal band at the drop of hat,  I used to drink for fun, now I drink out of neccessity, I used to be a man, now I'm a father.

Anyone want a baby?

We wear our games. Gamers, especially gamers active on the net, treat the games they play as a point of pride. We compartmentalize ourselves in these genre boxes as AT, Abstract, Euro, War... and cling to them as if they are some reason to be proud. I was talking with my brother this evening about music. We talked about genre distinctions in music, specifially around metal. He complained about how there must be a hundred different types of metal in a realtively brief time span and how many fans are so particular that he doubts they are really music fans at all. He said something like;

I don't play games in stores, I don't go to con's, and I generally avoid meeting weirdo's over the net to game with. I've been blessed with plenty of nerd friends over the years and a few "normal" friends who are more then willing to chuck some dice and play whatever I put in front of them. The people at BGG might be surprised to learn that TI:3, Powergrid, Here I Stand, and Peurto Rico are all playable by non-gamers. "Gateway" games can suck it! They aren't gateway games, they're family games.