Holy Shit I'm Drunk

Oh yes. This evening the British Embassy allowed the plebs in for a Diamond Jubilee party. Cost us $50 paid in advance and then $20 for 3 Stella but WTF!!

There was a band playing covers of Stevie Wonder, CCR, INXS etc etc and I had 9 cans of Stella. I rocked for 5 hours and am still pissed (that is drunk to the colonials).

Holy Shit!! A good time in TKWIL courtesy of the British Embassy. Good to see the police waiting outside the embassy car park to catch drunk people...fuck them... myself and my stunning wife got a taxi.

Nice! God save the Queen.

Wait... you were hammered on 6 beers? You're fucking slipping, you are.

9 you blind twat.

They were the half litre cans not the poncy 300ml cans

You're paying $20 for three cans of beer?

One question: Is the coast of TKWYL permanently guarded?

An Englishman using the metric system is certainly NOT allowed to call anyone using the English Standard system of measures "poncy."

ThirstyMan wrote: Oh yes. This evening the British Embassy allowed the plebs in for a Diamond Jubilee party. Cost us $50 paid in advance and then $20 for 3 Stella but WTF!!

There was a band playing covers of Stevie Wonder, CCR, INXS etc etc and I had 9 cans of Stella. I rocked for 5 hours and am still pissed (that is drunk to the colonials).

Holy Shit!! A good time in TKWIL courtesy of the British Embassy. Good to see the police waiting outside the embassy car park to catch drunk people...fuck them... myself and my stunning wife got a taxi.

That wasn't on behalf of the Queen, you fucking Teabag. It's because today is my 41st birthday. The Brits are merely showing the proper respect due a man of my station in life.

And, why yes, I AM on my 6th bottle of sake this evening. I'm closing in on being able to grunt and growl like Bunta Sugawara in the Yakuza Papers films at this point....

Happy birthday, Dog!

And nice job, Andy.

ThirstyMan wrote: 9 you blind twat.

They were the half litre cans not the poncy 300ml cans

Ah! That explains it then!

Happy Birthday Justin! ( if I'm wrong about your name blame it on the Dalwhinnie I just polished off)

Hey yeah. Happy Birthday Justin!!

More amusing details of the evening now that I am sadly sober again.

Yes, the beer was fucking expensive but this is TKWIL.

On the black market, 12 x 300ml cans of shitty Heineken costs $120, so lets get it into perspective.

An interesting point was the embassy does not allow you to take mobile phones or any electronic devices into the premises.

WOW! What a difference that makes. NOBODY tweeting, facebooking, mindlessly talking or irritating ring tones. Everybody could concentrate on the drinking. Love it.

On the stroke of midnight (no idea why they picked this time), a guy gets on the stage and says 'Can we all be upstanding for Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II' I'm thinking yeah, yeah, yeah, when suddenly a spotlight picks out a heavy metal guitarist standing on the roof of the embassy who then started to play a metal version (Hendrix style) of the National Anthem with feedback. WHAT THE FUCK!!!!

Is that fucking cool or what??

A good evening had by all (even by my stunning wife who doesn't really drink). Roll on The British Embassy in TKWIL.

Another amusing thing was looking up in the middle of the bands set and seeing locals peering in from high rise apartments overlooking the embassy. Yes, thats right, this is how the British enjoy themselves and NO YOU CAN'T COME IN. You keep on knocking but you can't come in. HA.

In case you were thinking of invading, Schweig, yes the coast is guarded with big fuck off missile boats. Next to the Emirs beach house, which backs onto a main coastal road, there is a big sign that reads ' Do not take photos or approach this sign' which is a bit fucking surreal. Do not even think about looking this way, NO.. stop looking in fact don't even think about looking!!

ThirstyMan wrote: Hey yeah. Happy Birthday Justin!!

Thanks man. I'm finally back on the fringes of sober myself. (Many bottles of sake here along with a veritable mountain of raw fish. Best toro I've had in a long time.) Glad we could share this drink today

ThirstyMan wrote: On the black market, 12 x 300ml cans of shitty Heineken costs $120, so lets get it into perspective.

Jesus wept man. I knew it was pricey, but that's just brutal. I presume importing homebrewing ingredients is prohibitively expensive, too? (I guess there's always honey for brewing up a mead...) You need a friend in the embassy with access to the diplomatic pouch. The USAID people my wife knows in garden spots like Pakistan bring all their alcohol in through the embassy (and, of course, send all their furniture and the like home via pouch to avoid all those troublesome customs duties...)

To be fair, it's easy to buy grape juice, bakers yeast and those Grolsch type bottles with the flip top from supermarkets. The Grolsch type bottles contain flat grape juice (so why would you need flip top pressure seal bottles you may well ask). Hence, wine is easy to make. I use those big water cooler canisters so I can airlock it effectively.

Beer is harder. You really need a kit. Luckily, there is a UK supplier who relabels his dry beer mix 'cake mix' especially for customers in TKWIL which gets it through customs. Big tins of sticky malt are too heavy.

Colleagues of mine have an extensive still in a six stage, near industrial process, so Vodka is not too difficult but pricey ($70 for 1.5 litres). I guess that is because the risk is high in the manufacturing in country.

So, if I'm to understand correctly, It's hotter than fucking Atlanta there- which in and of itself i so incon-fucking-cievable, as to make me shudder, AND you have to get creative and/or spendy just to get hammered.

I hope they're paying you a mint daddy.

Yes but creativity is fun. Makes the being hammered so much more worthwhile.

It's not the heat. Everyone has AC and electricity is free.

It isn't too humid so it's a dry heat. Then again 55C (131F) is still bastard hot.

The pain in the ass (and eyes) is the dust storms in that heat. Anyway, no more work until September and I'm out of here in early July wending my way to WBC via London.

55C??!! ( I'm Canadian- we do metric like the rest of the civilized world) Please tell me it gets to be a chilly 21 in the winter...

Fuck me, 55C... I'd fucking explode.

Yes, drops to around 8C in January. Only super hot June to October. No idea why BTW. It isn't on the equator but there is some wierd weather formation here that traps the heat.

It is currently 33C at night with no cloud cover.