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Kevin Klemme
March 09, 2020
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Mycelia Board Game Review

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December 12, 2023
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December 07, 2023
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River Wild Board Game Review

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oliverkinne
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November 30, 2023
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Outback Crossing Review

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What MOVIE(s) have you been....seeing? watching?

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14 Aug 2017 05:39 #252443 by Nodens
Valerian on the big screen. It's not going to be remembered at all in 10 years time. Even Guardians of the Galaxy had better acting and all-over chemistry. It doesn't have Gaultier, Moebius or Oldman. All its major problems are results of gutting the source material. Like getting Rihanna, extending her characters' part because Rihanna, then killing her off lazily because what else are we going to do? (Spoiler) The 'love story' between the main characters doesn't work. Initially I thought it was due to bad acting, but hey, even great actors can't act if you don't give them anything. Valerian is extremely hard to root for. Actually he's just an asshole. It's like the script was found on the internet or something. Also, the evil plan is dumb and sad and utterly nineties. The one from the source material was way too smart and realistic, I guess. Also, some major holes near the end (what happened to those commando robots?)
Nice shots, but not nearly enough of those. No worldbuilding, which is the core of that episode in the lives of the two space-time Agents. So no surprises, Besson doing his mindless thing in great visual style.
We came prepared, brought a flask of single malt and had a great time.
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16 Aug 2017 03:17 #252474 by Cranberries
I am prepping myself for a 5:50 a.m. colonoscopy. I am fifty. It is 1:00 a.m. and I just finished watching Passengers. I know I'm supposed to hate it, but it was ok. Not great science fiction, and contrived, but it was ok. I'd rather watch it again than drink any more magnesium sulfate. I'm typing this on the toilet. I haven't had diarrhea like this since I lived in Majuro and had parasites.
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16 Aug 2017 08:46 #252477 by Black Barney
it's hard to recognize shit when you've been p00ping your all of it out of your system like crazy during the pre-op. I would for sure think The Fog remake is better than drinking 4 lltres of that salty stuff which makes me puke as well. It's like the Exorcist when I drink that stuff.

i hope your procedure goes smoothly. If they find any dead-ends, it hurts a bit. People crap all over that procedure but there's nothing worse than the 24 hours before it when you can't eat and are drinking that horrible stuff and crapping your brains out. Plus, the post-op room where everyone is farting in symphony is really funny.

hope it went well!

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16 Aug 2017 08:56 #252478 by Michael Barnes
Well that was a shitpost.

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16 Aug 2017 08:57 #252479 by Black Barney
the dad humour is REAL

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16 Aug 2017 09:46 #252480 by RobertB
I had a colonoscopy a couple of months ago. The preparation now (at least the way our sadists want to do it) is to drink half of the propylene glycol the evening before, and half of it a few hours before the procedure. So I go to the clinic, and everything is still bubbling inside a little bit. I go to the restroom, and the restroom turns out to be a one-toilet, lock-the-door sort of bathroom. Nice. Good planning. I counted myself lucky I didn't go in my pants.
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16 Aug 2017 09:50 #252481 by Black Barney
the 4 liters they prescribe of that stuff is impossible to drink for me (I got a wicked weak gag reflex and it's salty AF). So it works out to about 16 short glasses full of it. I drank 1.5 glasses of it before I had enough. It still turned me into a NASA booster rocket. They didn't say anything the next day. I think that was enough to expunge my colon.
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16 Aug 2017 10:22 #252484 by Disgustipater
What a terrible sounding movie.
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16 Aug 2017 14:18 #252501 by Michael Barnes
"Canadian Colonoscopy", a new hit film starring Patrick O'Sullivan...

Well, I watched Ghost in the Shell.

That movie has me completely flummoxed. I don't know if I ever felt so completely indifferent to a movie in my entire life. It played out, I watched the whole thing, but I do not believe I had a twinkle of a feeling through the whole thing, beyond thinking about how damn pretty Scarlett Johansson is. But even that was sterile.

Here's the thing, I actually think the film totally works as a GITS film. ESPECIALLY visually. Some of that stuff was STRAIGHT out of the original film and comics. There were scenes and images that were like 1:1. Regardless of her whiteness, she looked EXACTLY like the Major and you could really tell that she had studied the anime and really wanted to accurately portray specific things like how she stands and how she reacts. I didn't know it was humanly possible for an actor to do that weird, very very slight twitch thing that anime characters sometimes do accompanied by a barely audible grunt.

But it just...sort of happened before my eyes. When it was over I just sort of said "how about that" and promptly erased most of the movie from my mind.

It was just all completely soulless and clinical, I guess that was what the deal was.
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16 Aug 2017 15:05 #252504 by Cranberries
I did cheer when the old guy defended himself against the thugs. But I agree it was pretty sterile.

I was able to drink about 3/4 of the Magnesium sulfate/Potassium stuff. I had no complaints. the doctor, I found out, does about 30 of these 20 minute explorations a day. So ten hours of butt-cam piloting.

Passengers, obviously, could have been much more interesting. Like if the bartender android was actually a puppet for the ship's AI, and was responsible for waking Chris Pratt to begin with.

Warning: Spoiler!
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16 Aug 2017 15:19 #252506 by mutagen
I know nothing of GITS, but took the kids to see it anyway. To me it felt like a studio found zombie Stanley Kubrick and told him to make a Bladerunner movie. But halfway through his brain fell out, so they finished it by committee. Maybe that makes it sound better than it was, or maybe worse. It was ... OK.
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16 Aug 2017 18:02 - 16 Aug 2017 18:03 #252513 by Cranberries

Black Barney wrote: i hope your procedure goes smoothly. If they find any dead-ends, it hurts a bit


They gave me Propofol, Michael Jackson's drug of choice. The nurse told me it would make me feel great, but I just fell asleep and woke up. It's one of the few chances I have to get high without going to hell and I was denied any free ride.
Last edit: 16 Aug 2017 18:03 by Cranberries.
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18 Aug 2017 19:55 #252640 by Black Barney
Has anyone actually watched X-Men: Apocalypse? I've made two attempts now and can't get very far into it. I can't even believe it's the same series as the rest of the X-Men movies. There are times it almost looks like a student film. And Sansa is AWFUL as young Jean.

I had no idea this movie was that bad. I'm so glad I didn't see it in theaters.

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18 Aug 2017 20:54 #252644 by Hex Sinister
Me, too. It was fucking terrible. What a waste.

I saw Aliens vs. Predators on cable. Imagine a SyFy channel movie but with a modest budget. Poor Lance Henricksen...
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19 Aug 2017 09:40 - 19 Aug 2017 09:42 #252656 by RobertB
I saw AvP at the drive-in (yes, we have a drive-in). I figured it would suck, and I wasn't disappointed.

X-Men: Apocalypse - my daughter thought it was the awesomest movie ever, but then she thinks Star Wars 1-3 are good. I've failed as a parent.
Last edit: 19 Aug 2017 09:42 by RobertB.
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