Worst movie experiences as a kid

moofrank wrote: We didn't have ANY theaters in the town where I grew up. The nearest theater was a drive-i about 30 minutes away. If we saw a movie, it was in Lexington, which was about an hour away.

So most of the movies I saw were at a run-down 70's era drive-in. This meant that I saw a lot of horror movies and general trash.

The worst was at age...6 or so. A double feature of Flesh Gordon and The Groove Tube. The interesting thing is that the movies left very little obvious memories, except I totally adored the giant toilet deathtrap and the awesome Flesh Gordon cyclops monster. Somehow, I don't think the softcore porn elements really registered with me.

Dad was totally wigged out by something in the Groove Tube, left halfway through Groove Tube, and just wouldn't speak on the drive home. Something on the order of "I've screwed up my kid for life. What have I done?"

I can't remember the scene at all, just Dad being so freaked.

Could have been anything as that movie had nudity, drugs, etc. Overall it is an ok skit (or anthology) film but I like Kentucky Fried Movie better. Still the Groove Tube was the first of the modern skit flicks.

Flesh Gordon - the penisauraus was hysterical but the best thing was the Ymir. That movie had some really good stop motion animation - and really soft core elements. I do not recall much full frontal nudity nor much screwing, even though Earth (or one airplane) is hit with a porno ray (I kid you not).

Not as a kid, but I've tried to watch The Haunting (1963) several times and it always creeps me out. To me that's the hallmark of an outstanding horror movie, the atmosphere. The 'make you jump' films just pale in comparison, to the extend that I don't really consider them horror movies (or even good movies), and yes, that's a huge generalisation.

Black Barney wrote:
" my babysitter let me watch Aliens when I was pretty young and I didn't sleep with her for the rest of the summer"
Fixed that for you.

I saw both of the movies later on. Kentucky Fried Movie is definitely the better choice skit movie, and INFINITELY quotable. The core of the movie (Fistful of Yen) is just jaw dropping at how perfect a recreation of Enter the Dragon it is.

As to Flesh Gordon, it is a surprisingly watchable movie. And the Ymir DOES completely steal the show. The special effects and stop motion are actually pretty decent. (David Allen did the stop motion very early in his career.)

Sandi tells me that most of the softcore fairy tale movies were also actually really funny. I occasionally scan Something Weird's catalog to see if they've been picked up any.

Was Fistful of Yen the movie which opens with a nice beautiful shot of the Statue of Liberty with NYC right behind it and then caption at the bottom reads, "HONG KONG"?

that was hilarious

Saw "food of the Gods" as a small child at the drive in and was terrified for days.

Also a REALLY bad experience. Ran into theater late buy tickets to Star Trek 3 (I think) run into theater, Oh shit previews are way over movie is going full swing. We arrived just in time to see Kirk escape the exploding planet by speaking into the communicator in klingon and tricking them into beaming him onboard.

Oh shit this was the end of the previous showing we just saw and we weren't late at all, we just saw the ending for the movie we hadn't seen yet. That was a pretty bad experience and thank you teenage theater punk worker for not telling us to stay outside.

Black Barney wrote: Was Fistful of Yen the movie which opens with a nice beautiful shot of the Statue of Liberty with NYC right behind it and then caption at the bottom reads, "HONG KONG"?

that was hilarious

Yes.

That skit is probably one of the funniest things I had ever seen. You will also see some early Zucker brothers/Jim Abraham comedy blossoming that ended up in Airplane (some of their other skits show more of this comedy).

But back to Fistful of Yen, I love that the bad guy was into so much illegal activity including movie distribution. And of course the prisoner who gets sentenced to Detroit.

I saw this movie when I was around 12. My friend's father took us to this film. The ticket seller reminded him it was rated R. He said he knew and then the seller made it a point to say it was a rough R. I guess all those boobies were too much for children (Catholic High School Girls in Trouble).

Also, my friend and his dad were eating popcorn and I had a snickers bar. So the first seen is a newsman who starts off with "The popcorn you are eating has just been pissed in. Film at 11." And I turn to my friend and start cracking up. The film was all uphill from there. So funny.

Unfortunately, I stumbled on Kentucky Fried Movie late at night on basic cable when I was about 12 also, so I missed all the boobies (don't worry, I've seen them plenty since then). I was so blown away by the movie and couldn't stop laughing. I couldn't wait to tell my dad about this awesome movie. Little did I know, he had already seen it. Turns out my dad wasn't as uncool as I thought at the time.

I loved finding these gems late at night. I remember on many occasions lying in bed thinking about how awesome the movie I had just seen was. American Grafitti was the other that really stays with me. That, more than probably any movie I saw in theaters, really turned me into a movie lover.