Need a Christmas Gift Idea

Over here, we're not really into giving presents to each other for much the same reason. We have pretty much everything we need (apart from latest iphone, ipad, idick for the wife which I refuse to buy because she doesnt want it for the actual phone, just because everyone else has one and they look shiney)

Birthdays and Christmas are no big deal over here because we have a fucking good time ALL THE TIME. Unlike you losers, who can only get it together to celebrate shit when Hallmark tells you to.

Is a Brown Bess, American code for a turd? If it is, I would put the bar a bit higher than that.

It's a musket, Andy. And it's actually an ENGLISH musket.

Go educate yourself on your history, son!