What do you THINK you know about fellow F:ATties?

superflytnt wrote:

Something tells me that being loud and outspoken has little to do with the size of your schlong (or schlittle, as the case may be). ;D

-50 points for taking this bullshit seriously

No I'm no pot-head. I like going outdoors and thinking clearly. I don't mind pulling off one if I'm already shitfaced though.

Is this topic now dead that we've brought up penis size?

You've got to be kidding, Jur! No way am I taking it seriously or being offended in any way. I thought it was a riot, and my whole post was a setup to get the "pee on his balls" line out there. Some jokes are just for me!

There's a place in Las Vegas called "Dick's Last Resort" and the schtick is that the waitstaff is incredibly rude. It's like a roomful of hecklers. Anyhow, they take butcher's paper and make these faux chef-hats for the more rowdy patrons to wear, complete with black magic marker slogans on them.

Anyhow, a buddy of mine ordered ribs, and they offered him a plastic bib. He kept taking it off, so the waitress came over with a black, 55 gallon trash bag, and cut arm and a head hole, then proceeded to put it on him.

Many of the people were laughing at him (he was NOT amused) and the waitress looked over at the guy sitting next to me, another friend, and said something to the effect of, "Oh, so you think this is funny, do you?" and left. She came back with one of those hats, plopped it on his head, and walked off. He didn't realize what it said, but everyone simultaneously saw it and broke out in hysterical laughter. "It's so small I pee on my balls" was written in big, bold, black magic marker.

That ONE moment made the entire trip palatable.

+200 points to Pete for having previously owned an AMC Hornet.

I drove an '85 Taurus 'till the tranny gave out. I miss that piece of shit now that it's gone.

BillyZ - misses his tranny.

billyz wrote:

+200 points to Pete for having previously owned an AMC Hornet.

I drove an '85 Taurus 'till the tranny gave out. I miss that piece of shit now that it's gone.

All I envisioned was a transgender underneath the car with their feet sticking out ala The Flintstones and providing momentum.

Just like this, but picture it all beat up with grey, flaking-off paint.

Our car was written off 2 weeks ago in a flash flood and I have had to move from my normal happy 'who gives a fuck what car people drive' mode into obsessing about them. I can't wait to move on with my life.

I have the rep in my social group for having the biggest penis, mainly because they took my word on it, not because we have sat around naked together with a measuring tape, and because they believe I'm not the sort of guy to who needs to lie about that sort of thing, or am I just deluding them because I am so insecure?

I like my 'short fuse' theory better - I thought it was quite accurate

My first iPhone post ! I think the way u know if u have a big schlOng is if you have had gfs that have wanted to measure u

Black Barney - Now posts on F:AT like a teenager in IMSpeak.

Southernman - It's all about the fuse.

I hate cars but if you don't have one in Canada you ain't getting too far.

Ancient_of_MuMu wrote:

I have the rep in my social group for having the biggest penis, mainly because they took my word on it, not because we have sat around naked together with a measuring tape, and because they believe I'm not the sort of guy to who needs to lie about that sort of thing, or am I just deluding them because I am so insecure?

ROFL! See, context plays a big part in this. If your friends all have dicks that look like a box turtle's head or a large shirt button, then it's not saying much. If your "social circle" includes pornstars and donkeys, well, then that's different entirely!

I drive classic Vespas, up until we moved last year and I couldn't reasonably get by without, I hadn't even owned a car for about 7 years.

Besides, it's all about girth if you're lookin for mirth! I got a cube, 3.5 x 3.5!

yeah I think girth is important. I is like can of Pepsi.

Nothing like hitting the tuna with a tuna can!

Vespas rock, Matt, and especially the vintage ones. My cousin got impaled by a pound of gravel (in her tit, no less) in Greece on one of those, so there's always been a fondness in my heart for them. Cool rides, to be sure.