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Michael Barnes

Written by: Michael Barnes
#Pictured is a game that doesn't look like any fun to me at all. Images like this are why I wasn't terribly enthusiatic about Vlaada Chvatil's DUNGEON LORDS prior to release. I thought it was going to win...
March 25th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#This week's Cracked LCD is one of those highbrow theory articles that I like to write every so often about the way I think games ought to be. I tried really hard to piss someone off in it by calling game...
March 18th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#Hey, guess what? I have a full-blown video game review up at! It's for GREED CORP, an XBLA/PSN board's a pretty good one, and for the first time ever I'll have something up on Met...
March 15th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#In this week's bid to piss off Fortress: AT readers, I'm reviewing a game that almost no one will be able to play. It's GREED, INCORPORATED and the review is, as usual, at Some suggested t...
March 11th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#Today is a dark day for Here I was thinking that we represented the best and brightest community in all of hobby gaming and in our first contest, not a single F:ATtie has won a prize. I a...
March 5th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#The Count suggests a couple of interesting questions: 1. Where and on whom does he feed? 2. Does having a vampire's castle in the neighborhood lower property values on Sesame Street? That all has noth...
March 4th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
# Frank Branham claimed that CLAUSTROPHOBIA "might be better than SPACE HULK" when he introduced it to me. I listened to my gut instinct, which tells me that no man that enjoys the taste and texture of C...
February 25th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
# RUNEWARS is, as many of us know by now, a pretty great game. I like it a lot, and after owning it for about a month I still want to play it week in and week out, which is a good sign. I think it's got ...
February 18th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#HERE IT IS, folks, the opportunity of a lifetime. Fortress: Ameritrash, in conjunction with Plaid Hat Games is offering you a chance to design a card for their great SUMMONER WARS game. Yes, that's right...
February 16th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
# You may ask yourself "why the hell was John Romero, designer of DAIKATANA, talking about Sid Sackson last week?" The answer is that Mr. Doom himself was giving a talk about the "Masters of Game Design"...
February 11th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
# By now, you've probably heard that SUMMONER WARS is a good one- our very own Matt Drake wrote a review of it something like ten years ago and gave it high praise. I even stole the picture at left from ...
February 4th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#Gee guys, aren't you glad that board gaming is so elegant and sophisticated that it has no room in its pantheon for a big ol' piece of vibrating sheet metal with miniature football players running all ov...
January 28th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
# Things are slowly returning to normal at stately Barnes Manor now that Young Master Barnes, River Atticus, is here. And of course, I can't stand to miss a deadline so here's this week's Cracked LCD- a ...
January 21th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
#Here they are, fashionably late and probably not very surprising- your Cracked LCD Games of the Year for 2009. Pictured at left is a man eating a giant hamburger. It has nothing to do with this article. ...
January 7th, 2010
Written by: Michael Barnes
# "Today is Christmas. There will be a magic show at eleven hundred hours."  That's one of my favorite lines in FULL METAL JACKET. In context, it's bizarre and almost completely alien.  Anyway, it's ...
December 17th, 2009
Written by: Michael Barnes
#OK, this just in from FFG. The new big box game is HORUS HERESY, obviously a 40K-themed board game and I _think_ it may actually be a ridiculously produced edition of the old game of the same name, it's ...
December 11th, 2009
Written by: Michael Barnes
# Pictured is Swiss artist HR Giger with what must be the coolest model train of all time. Note that Mr. Giger is not wearing engineer overalls or a hat, nor is he wearing a red hanky and going "woo woo!...
December 10th, 2009
Written by: Michael Barnes
Thought I'd write up another couple of iPhone games I've checked out...there's been some really good ones to come out over the last month and if you're looking for a good time for about a dollar, it's a ...
December 7th, 2009
Written by: Michael Barnes
#Sadly, this installment of Michael's Magical Mailbag over at does not include a Cease and Desist letter. I feel left out, marginalized, and disappointed. What do I have to do to get one? W...
December 3th, 2009
Written by: Michael Barnes
# A couple of months ago, editor-in-chief Bill Abner said "no Barnes, I want to do the CHAOS IN THE OLD WORLD    review".  This was back when I was a doubter and I thought the game was g...
November 19th, 2009
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