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The Cruel Shoes: Games you keep buying.

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15 Jan 2018 18:01 #261010 by Cranberries
Anna knew She had to have a new pair of shoes today, and Carlo had helped her try on every pair in the store. Carlo spoke wearily, "Well, that's it. That's every pair of shoes in the place."

"Oh, you must have one more pair...."

"No, not one more... . Well, we have the cruel shoes, but no one would want to try...

"Yes, let me see the cruel shoes!"

"No, you don't understand, you see, the cruel shoes are...'

"Get them!"

Carlo disappeared into the back room for a moment, and then reappeared carrying an ordinary shoebox. He took off the lid and re-moved a hideous pair of black and white pumps. But this was not an ordinary pair of black and white pumps; both were left feet, one had a right angle turn with sepa-rate compartments that pointed the toes in impossible directions. The other shoe was six inches long and was curved inward like a rocking chair with a vise and razor blades to hold the foot in place.

Carlo spoke hesitantly, "... Now you see... they' re not fit for humans..." "Put them on me."

"But... "Put them on me!"

Carlo knew all arguments were useless. He knelt down before her and forced the feet into the shoes.

The screams were incredible.

Anna crawled over to the mirror and held her bloody feet up where she could see.

"I like them."

She paid Carlo and crawled out of the store into the street.

Later that day, Carlo was overheard saying to a new customer, "Well, that's it. That's every pair of shoes in the place. Unless, of course, you'd like to try the cruel shoes."
--Steve Martin

What are the games you keep buying, even though you know you will never read the rules or play it, or talk your friends into playing it? What are the elements of the games you keep buying, even though they leave you broken and miserable? What are the Cruel Shoes in your collection, the bad girlfriend, the box of unspeakable horror that you are drawn to, time and time again?

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15 Jan 2018 18:04 #261012 by Gary Sax
I've played Armada in the realm of 7-8 times but since I've moved, I just don't have any opportunities to play it beyond solo. Yet I still keep buying the new expansions. Which especially dumb because the new expansions get increasingly more specialized and niche... made for frequent players and tournament upgrade juggler types probably.
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15 Jan 2018 18:14 #261015 by SuperflyPete
None. Well, now.

I have Elder Sign for the third time. But this time I’m playing it.
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15 Jan 2018 18:46 #261022 by san il defanso
I am not one to continue drilling into a product line unless I intend to play it a lot. I have a few games where I bought everything, but those are well-played favorites like Cosmic Encounter and Talisman.

One that I continue to purchase in spite of limited time to play is D&D 5th Edition. I get to play maybe once a month if I'm lucky, but I've bought the three core books, two other rulebooks, an adventure book, the starter set, and a couple accessories in the past year. It essentially became the place where I threw my money over 2017.

I've had two games that I've acquired and moved on multiple times: Arkham Horror and Race For The Galaxy. Arkham Horror became too uninteresting to me in an unexpanded form, and too unmanageable for me in expanded form. RftG is a great game that I find impossible to teach. No one wants to play it with me, and I managed to land Glory to Rome, which I like better anyway.

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15 Jan 2018 20:03 #261031 by SuperflyPete
RFTG is easy for me to teach. My old group was notoriously stoned in perpetuity and needed reminders constantly. It was brutal. Grating.

So, I developed the ability to teach games in understandable and easy to remember ways.

TLDR: get dumb friends who take drugs and you will become a Game Teacher of high quality.
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15 Jan 2018 22:31 #261049 by Sevej
Warhammer-fucking-forty-kay. I have over 100 of the dudes. Sometimes entertain the notion to play them. But never. It took me a lot of time to buy a $40 board game, yet I plonk over $100 easily on 15 guys and a 40k helicopter-equivalent.
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15 Jan 2018 23:55 #261057 by Cranberries

SuperflyTNT wrote: RFTG is easy for me to teach. My old group was notoriously stoned in perpetuity and needed reminders constantly. It was brutal. Grating.

So, I developed the ability to teach games in understandable and easy to remember ways.

TLDR: get dumb friends who take drugs and you will become a Game Teacher of high quality.


I cry all the time about not having a group that wants to play the games I like, but when they have shown an interest I've been too lazy to learn the rules and teach them. Ironic, given that I teach technical writing.
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16 Jan 2018 02:16 #261061 by SuperflyPete
Read the Seal Team Flix Rules and lament
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16 Jan 2018 09:12 - 16 Jan 2018 09:14 #261068 by charlest

san il defanso wrote: RftG is a great game that I find impossible to teach. No one wants to play it with me, and I managed to land Glory to Rome, which I like better anyway.


You need to try Jump Drive sometime.

geekandsundry.com/settle-the-stars-and-b...tes-with-jump-drive/
Last edit: 16 Jan 2018 09:14 by charlest.

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16 Jan 2018 09:25 #261070 by Cranberries

charlest wrote:

san il defanso wrote: RftG is a great game that I find impossible to teach. No one wants to play it with me, and I managed to land Glory to Rome, which I like better anyway.


You need to try Jump Drive sometime.

geekandsundry.com/settle-the-stars-and-b...tes-with-jump-drive/


Me: Let's get together and talk about the unhealthy side of our addiction.

Everyone: Hey, try some of this stuff. It's pretty good and has a smooth come down.




I love how the price points on these games are such that for only $5.00 you can get the longer, heavier version of the game that you'll never play unless you know a Pete.
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16 Jan 2018 09:56 #261072 by Shellhead
Not so much a game but a setting that I keep buying into: Rokugan. I played the Legend of the Five Rings ccg a fair amount in the mid-'90s, then ran a surprisingly popular L5R rpg campaign that eventually had to be split into two separate groups because we had so many players. Since then, I have sporadically purchased some L5R cards and rpg materials even though I don't play either any more.

I thought that I was finally safe when AEG ended their L5R card game, but it turned out that FFG bought the license, and has been cranking out new L5R stuff since last summer. I am tempted to get back into the CCG now that it is an LCG, but I am not sure if I will enjoy the significant changes that FFG made to the rules. And they did an area control boardgame called Battle for Rokugan that looks like a streamlined Game of Thrones re-sleeved for the L5R setting. (There are some significant similarities between Rokugan and Westeros, such as seven major noble families and a huge wall built to keep out invaders from a specific direction, but they are coincidental. Legend of the Five Rings was first on sale in 1995, while A Game of Thrones was published in 1996, but I think that everybody understands that it takes George R.R. Martin more than one year to write a big book like that.

Another game could end up being a problem for me: Firefly. Like most Gale Force 9 games, it does a great job with expressing the theme and setting but runs a little long. So it's hard to get it on the table despite the quality of the game. But I can play it solo, and so I am tempted to start buying the expansions for additional replay value. Maybe I need to actively recruit fans of the show who aren't heavy into the buying/collecting aspect of boardgaming. I belong to a local facebook group for geeks that now has over 9,000 members, so I should be able to locate some Firefly fans.

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16 Jan 2018 10:54 #261083 by SuperflyPete
To be fair, I don’t play much anymore. There’s a couple of local groups of good people I know but my schedule doesn’t allow for a lot of things. Mostly because my stay-at-home wife doesn’t have many friends anymore and isn’t a super gamer so I’d essentially be ditching her a lot to go play games, which feels really shitty to do.

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16 Jan 2018 11:00 #261085 by san il defanso

charlest wrote:

san il defanso wrote: RftG is a great game that I find impossible to teach. No one wants to play it with me, and I managed to land Glory to Rome, which I like better anyway.


You need to try Jump Drive sometime.

geekandsundry.com/settle-the-stars-and-b...tes-with-jump-drive/


I would like to, although my desire to play has been mostly satisfied by playing Glory to Rome. That game has much the same level of strategy, but it's a lot more in line with my tastes.
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17 Jan 2018 06:04 #261163 by Chaz
I keep buying the freaking COIN games from GMT. I'm up to five now, I'm waffling on Pendragon that just came out, will definitely wind up with a reprint copy of Andean Abyss, and probably that Ghandi one if it makes it out this year. I've never gotten to play one with other people. I've on managed a single solo game of Fire in the Lake. Back when my buddies and I were playing weekly online, I tried to convince them to try Cuba Libre, and never managed to make it happen.

I still buy the stupid things. I really like the concept and engine. I think it's mainly that the series is so popular that if you don't get one within a month of release, it could be a year or more before it gets a reprint, if ever, so there's a definite FOMO thing. I guess the good news is that if I ever convince myself to sell, they usually manage to go up in value, so I'll make some money.

Other than that, since I literally never get to play anything, I've mostly stopped buying new games.
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17 Jan 2018 09:49 #261171 by stoic
For me, it's the D&D Adventure Board Game System. I own Castle Ravenloft, Wrath of Ashardalon, Legend of Drizzt, and Temple of Elemental Evil. I now feel compelled to purchase Tomb of Annilhilation even though the quality apparently sucks. It's Cruel Shoes to be sure. And, it doesn't help that Barnes says it's good. I'm just waiting for a price drop. I've played all of the ones that I own and I've gotten my money's worth, but, the only one of these that I play frequently is Castle Ravenloft because I like the setting and Vampires--it's the one that most want to play.

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