Players that never get any better

Do any of you play with people who never seem to improve at the games that they play. They remain fans of the games and have played them over and over but just continue to suck and make the same mistakes.

I have a few of these players in my group and I can get a little frustrated sometimes with them. I try to be nice about it but it can be really frustrating especially when you are playing team or co-op games.

Latest example: I'm playing axis and allies anniversary, I'm Japan and the player in question is Germany/Italy.

Several turns into the game I'm sitting pretty collecting 77 ipcs a turn with all of China, India, Australia and half of Russia under my domain while my partner through his poor play(not because of a europe focus by the allies they have a huge pacific fleet) is hardly holding europe and has lost his large force on the Russian front.

The player in question has been playing A&A for years and years and loves the game but he is just plain terrible. He doesn't seem to see anything more than a turn ahead.

Any attempts to "coach" don't go very well.

I have a real competitive side which may amplify this but man can it bug me.

Yep! Used to play Magic with him and I think he'd only win on a huge mana screw for me. He'll win at some games, but largely I just don't think he's all that competitive.

Granted, I've never played co-ops with him, but I could see it being kind of annoying, except he'd probably take coaching pretty well. Unless someone dishonored him or something - then it'd be vendetta time...

I think I am that guy. In high school my friend and I played a lot of Magic, Star Wars CCG, a few other CCGs, some skirmish GW minis games (Necromunda, Gorkamorka) and Blood Bowl. I usually got trounced by making the same mistakes over and over and over.

This thread also makes me think of Players That Never Remember the Rules. I have a friend we played Axis and Allies a least once a month for four years. And he could never remember all the rules. Especially tank blitzing. Sheesh.

I'm one of them too.

You need to chill out - they're only boardgames ;-p

I have a buddy of mine who loves Power Grid, but to my knowledge, has never won. Every time I play with him, he ends up towards the back of the placing, if not out of the running altogether. We just kind of factor it into the experience and take it in stride.

He is also the Guy Who Forgets Rules, so we are very wary of teaching him new games. He'll forever try to do something that he can't do.

"I'm gonna do this."
"You can't do that."
"Alright, then I'll do this."
"No you can't do that either."

And repeat until he bumps into a move he CAN do, even if it doesn't serve any discernible purpose. This will happen every turn of the game.

The weird thing is, he'll often come to us and ask to play a game again, and the second time won't be nearly as painful. That's why we pretty much play Power Grid, Ticket to Ride, and Settlers with him exclusively.

Is there something wrong with my monitor? I keep reading the title of this thread as "STEVE AVERY".

This one guy used to play Arkham Horror with us all the time, until his fiancee decided that wasn't acceptable behavior for a grown man. That was okay with us, because he didn't really want to play on our team, in game where there is only one team.

Every single game, he camped out at the Silver Twilight Lodge until he got his membership card, then hung out as much as possible in the Inner Sanctum. Once in a while, a gate would open up there, forcing him to have an adventure in some strange dimension.

One time, he got the mission Playing for the Other Team, the one where you really do get to join the GOO's team if you sacrifice one ally each in several other dimensions. He rushed over to the Boarding House, in hopes of randomly getting allies. He found out the hard way that none of the encounters there yield free allies.

I used to play with this beast at my old boarding house who just didn't get the whole don't-trade-with-the-guy-who-has-9-points in SETTLERS OF CATAN.
"Micki, don't trade with him, he's going to win."
"But I need wheat."
"Yeah, so does everyone. Don't get it from him--he's probably got some VPs there. He'll win if you trade with him."
She shrugs, trades, and he wins.

...do this like twice a week for two months. FUCK! She was terrible.

Hitler felt the exact same way about Mussolini.

Sag.

Southernman wrote:

I'm one of them too.

You need to chill out - they're only boardgames ;-p

I'm "Can't Remember the Rules" Guy. Approximately 20% of all relevant rules, and 100% of all chrome, evaporate from my head the minute I sit down at the table, even if I read the rules for the 30th time 10 minutes before. Add to that playing 5 different games that have very similar but not quite the same rules ["Ok, is Unhappy King Charles the game where I can PICK UP troops during a move but can't DROP OFF or is that Wilderness War and it's the reverse here?"], and I'm guaranteed to be reading the rulebook during play.

It's still primarily a social experience, and at least you have folks who are willing to play.

Dogmatix wrote:

Southernman wrote:

I'm one of them too.

You need to chill out - they're only boardgames ;-p

I'm "Can't Remember the Rules" Guy. Approximately 20% of all relevant rules, and 100% of all chrome, evaporate from my head the minute I sit down at the table, even if I read the rules for the 30th time 10 minutes before. Add to that playing 5 different games that have very similar but not quite the same rules ["Ok, is Unhappy King Charles the game where I can PICK UP troops during a move but can't DROP OFF or is that Wilderness War and it's the reverse here?"], and I'm guaranteed to be reading the rulebook during play.

It's still primarily a social experience, and at least you have folks who are willing to play.

Yeah, but do you keep asking the same rules question the entire night?

My brother is like that. We mostly play dungeon crawls and other games which you don't really need to be competitive so it doesn't really matter.

I know a player who just can't fight. He grew up on eurogames and now is constantly trying to find surreal/anti-thematic rule loopholes in games. Of course this works in euros, but it fails in a battle game which tries to simulate to some extent proven strategies and tactics, because you're somehow inclined to use real strategies and tactics to win. If he does stupid things and gets beaten up, he complains that his side was unbalanced from the beginning. Routing someone isn't fun, when that person doesn't fight back.

I have a friend who almost never managed to win in Cosmic Encounter. He is always close, 4 planets, handful of cards, yet at the end there is someone else laughing. Always gets screwed by morph, emotion control, cosmic zap or such. But that is not because of skill I guess, he's just unlucky.

I have a curse on me that prohibits me form winning any economic game. I ALWAYS finish second in Indonesia or Acquire, even if I start well. Dunno why but I suck bad at economics.

I found the key winning strategy is to start out badly and complain the rest of the game about it. The other players will think you already settled for your defeat and won't even try in winning. Then in the endgame you need one swinging move to claim victory. (This move can be prepared.)

For example in my next game of HERE I STAND as the Protestant I will only try to convert and hold the electorates and then until the Schmalkaldic League is played confine myself to translating but not completing bibles or disgracing one or the other debater. If the League comes in play and half of Europe is under Protestant religious control, the Hapsburg player will most likely start a war - something you'd like to avoid as the militarily feeble Protestant.