Mixed message on anti-bullying in schools

QPCloudy wrote: I'm a little worried about my oldest daughter. She is 10 and will be 11 in two months. She has a growth hormone deficiency, which isn't TOO bad, just she will probably never grow over 4'11''. She will likely ALWAYS be the littlest\shortest kid in class. Right now it's all good, but high school could be another story.

Since she's female I don't think this will be a problem.

thing work slightly different in North America than Germany, Schweig. Statistically, girls are bullied more than boys in North America. A 12-yr old girl was killed a couple weeks ago in California as a recent example.

I sort of blame the parents more on that one. It was a clear case of being told the classic, "if someone hits you, you hit them back as hard as you can." So two girls find themselves in an alley and they've both been told the same thing by their parents so they keep hitting until one can't hit back anymore.

Actually I think she was younger than 12. Might be 8 or 9

anyway, good thread. I'll have to borrow ideas from Cloudy since I have a girl and want to know how his girls fare out

I'd love to know how Izzy Kalman suggests kids avoid getting upset by taking regular physical beatings, and what ideas she has on how the children can be nice in return for receiving repeated punches to the face and chest.

I was bullied at school. I was given that kind of advice in the face of that kind of treatment. It didn't help very much at the time. As an adult, with that experience under my belt, it looks dangerously naive.

I joked my way out of most fights. The fights were I acted more like the victim didn't turn out good for me at all.

And the two times I fought back really hard made me feel terrible, ashamed and I think I cried or something.

man school is rough. My poor girl

QPCloudy wrote: Don't call someone a jerk, unless they are a jerk.

I'm a little worried about my oldest daughter. She is 10 and will be 11 in two months. She has a growth hormone deficiency, which isn't TOO bad, just she will probably never grow over 4'11''. She will likely ALWAYS be the littlest\shortest kid in class. Right now it's all good, but high school could be another story.

Dude, sounds like my. My 10 year old is going to be little as shit too. Japanese heritage is fucking dick then bullshit.

So, I've taught her wristlocks, reverse punches, and the much-loved brachial stun. Unfortunately, she doesn't have her parents' savage demeanor, so she'll likely just get picked on and take it.

The best cure for a bully is a miniature baseball bat, slid down the pants leg and held to the belt with a bent end of a coathanger with a string. I was shorter than most, and I was a chubby kid. The fact that the bullies in school didn't know my dad was a Special Forces vet, and my two older brothers were an All American wrestlers and baseball player, I leared to fight young.

But, we moved around a lot, and I was white going to predominantly Mexican schools, so it was worse. But, I only got my ass beat once. I learned young that in this world, diplomacy can only go so far, at some point, you will have to fight, and when you do, do so with as much vigor and savagery as you can muster, because one of you is going to the hospital, and Dad can't afford the bills, so you need to take them out. I probably had 30 fights by the time I was in High School, but at that point I was going to a better school, so I only had a couple fights IN school. And they both went REALLY badly for the other guy. If you spread your arms like a bird and say, "what's up" it's already too late, that's your ass. I've already kicked you in the chest twice.

MattDP wrote: I'd love to know how Izzy Kalman suggests kids avoid getting upset by taking regular physical beatings, and what ideas she has on how the children can be nice in return for receiving repeated punches to the face and chest.

I was bullied at school. I was given that kind of advice in the face of that kind of treatment. It didn't help very much at the time. As an adult, with that experience under my belt, it looks dangerously naive.

Basically, I think the old "sticks and stones" idiom still applies. You missed the part where I said that physical attacks/bullying can't be ignored or laughed off the same way as verbal attacks (although Kalman does recommend ignoring minor pushing and stuff like that... if it didn't really hurt you, then why act hurt about it, which is what the bully wants?). A lot of times, though, bullying starts with verbal attacks. Gain some power and control over your reaction to verbal teasing, and you can prevent at least some of the physical attacks. If you act like a victim, then guess what, you'll be a victim, and that will likely escalate over time. There's no 100% solution for every kid, but I don't see how reacting in a hostile way to verbal bullying does anything but feed into the problem and give the bullies what they want.

Another problem with the "Stop the Bully" campaigns is that they are sexist. Most show boys only as bullys but the sad fact is that most bullys in school are females these days.

Steve Weeks wrote: Another problem with the "Stop the Bully" campaigns is that they are sexist. Most show boys only as bullys but the sad fact is that most bullys in school are females these days.

This is an absolutely spectacular point.

I don't know about the "most bullies" part, but odds are good that they are missing close to half of them with sexist slanted adverts.

Most fights in my daughters middle school are by girls not boys. Shows like MTV's Teen Mom, Jerry Springer and The View show how aggressive women and girls have become.

Girls are acting like fools these days while boys are more passive with dumb looks on their faces like cows. Being raised by hippies is most likely the root cause along with gender confusion with even kids getting sex changes. Sad state of affairs only to be remedied by a "Back to Basics and back to church revolution" and repealing the 19th ammendement.

Let's not forget the gay teachers, Steve. It's clearly all their fault.

Schweig! wrote: Let's not forget the gay teachers, Steve. It's clearly all their fault.

Ladies & Gentlemen: it's the Culture Wars Death Match Monday Special!

Featuring, in the left corner with the turd on his head: Schweig! the Pinko Liberal Teutonic Surrender Monkey

And in the right corner, sporting the Stars & Bars: Steve Weeks, the Voice of Ameritrash!

Week throws himself straight into the melee, overwhelming the spectators with old fashioned Kulturpessimismus which reminds me of Oswald Sprengler. A great Culture Warrior in his day and age...

And there's Schweig! reserving his infamous Godwin BodySlam (tm) for a later date and just ripping a biting accusation of anti-gay bigotry.

Now, how's Weeks gonna react? Will he stumble into Schweig!s gaping trap and slam the likes of Ellen Degeneris or will he continue to pound on the liberal's dominated media feeding our kids with CRAP!?

We'll know.. right after this commercial break...

Jur wrote: We'll know.. right after this commercial break...

This show is boring. Let's watch Mike & Molly.

ubarose wrote: the power of the group to exclude and ignore that is the most psychologically damaging

I believe this too.

I remember in elementary school a shy, normal girl was socially ostracized because everyone said she had "les poux", which in English literally means lice but the meaning was more like she had a contagious disease of some kind. Nobody would want to sit or stand next to her. It kills me to think of kids going through that kind of thing every day. I feel bad that while I didn't play along with that game I didn't have the sense at the time to oppose or subvert it.